Are you constantly chasing happiness like it's the last piece of chocolate cake on earth? Are you working your butt off, thinking that the next big achievement will bring you eternal joy? Well, I hate to break it to you, but you're barking up the wrong frickin’ tree!
Let me share a little secret: happiness is not a destination, it's a journey. And that journey starts with gratitude. Yup, you heard me right. Being grateful for what you have is the key to true fulfillment and happiness.
Now, I know what you're thinking: "But, Bhupi, how can I be happy when I don't have a fancy car or a designer wardrobe?" Let me tell you, material possessions don't mean squat! Happiness comes from within, not from external factors or the shiny objects you can buy.
Allow me the honour of showing you how...
We've been brainwashed by society to think that happiness is something we'll achieve once we reach a certain level of success. But let me tell you, that's a bunch of crap! I fell into that trap myself. I thought I'd be happy once I graduated from university, got a good job, and settled down with a husband and kids. And so on. It was always one thing after another, and I was never truly happy. I was so miserable and unhappy.
For most of us, its this mindset that has led to a perpetual state of unhappiness and unfulfillment because we are constantly striving for more.
We are conditioned to believe that we need external validation to feel happy. Our families, society, and culture set these rules because they believe that this is the way to achieve happiness. They want us to be successful and happy, but they fail to realise that happiness cannot be achieved through external factors.
As a young Indian woman in her 20s, I experienced immense pressure to conform to societal norms and get married, start a family, and settle down. The constant emphasis on finding a suitable partner felt suffocating, with every social gathering turning into a search for potential suitors. I felt like I was on parade for a live auction and the best suitor wins! I had to dress a certain way, wear certain clothes and jewellery, act demure and not be my normal self. I vividly recall a particular incident while grocery shopping with my mum, who is the epitome of kindness and warmth. She remarked, "Soon, you will be like those items on the top shelf, past their expiration date." I was taken aback, flabbergasted, and utterly speechless.
As I grew older, finding a husband became the topmost priority for my family, and the guilt and shame that came with being unmarried made me feel like an unwanted and forgotten object gathering dust on a shelf.
Eventually, I met Sanjeev, and we tied the knot. Despite our glaring differences, we made it work. I was pregnant within a few months of being married and motherhood took over and becoming a wife or I moved further and further down 
the list. However, as the boys got older and became independent and more self-sufficient, I realised that I had been living my life for them and had lost sight of my own happiness. Menopause further exacerbated these feelings of misery and discontent.
It wasn’t until I started working from within that I came to appreciate my own company and have found happiness within myself. Sometimes, we can get caught up in the pursuit of external pleasures such as partying and socializing, but these things can only provide temporary satisfaction.
True and lasting happiness comes from inside, and it's important to cultivate a healthy relationship with ourselves and learn to love and appreciate who we are. I was living that life for the whole of my 20’s and it wasn’t until I had a complete burnout in my 40s, that I realised what being happy was all about! This is why I choose to be a happiness coach because I know how to teach each and every single one of you how to find joy every single day.
It's essential to recognize that happiness is not something that can be found outside of ourselves. We must take responsibility for our own happiness and learn to be content with what we have, rather than constantly seeking the next big thing that will bring us joy.
So, here's the deal. Stop chasing external validation and start being grateful for what you have. Instead of focusing on what you lack, focus on what you have. Appreciate the little things in life and find joy in the present moment. Learn to love yourself and break the cycle of always looking for the next thing that will make you happy.
Gratitude is the Foundation of Happiness
Yes, you read that correctly. Gratitude is the key and foundation of being happy. It is the ability to appreciate the good things in life, no matter how small. When we focus on what we have rather than what we don't have, we create a positive mindset that attracts more positivity into our lives. This mindset shift can have a profound impact on our overall well-being and happiness.
For instance, instead of focusing on the things we lack, we can be grateful for the things we have. We can be grateful for the roof over our heads, the food on our table, the people in our lives, our health, our talents, and so on. When we shift our focus from what we lack to what we have, we create a positive mindset that attracts more positivity into our lives.
Another way to cultivate gratitude is by practicing mindfulness. Mindfulness is the practice of being present in the moment and observing our thoughts without judgment. It allows us to appreciate the present moment and find joy in the simple things in life. When we practice mindfulness, we learn to appreciate the beauty of nature, the sound of birds chirping, the taste of our food, the warmth of the sun, and so on. We learn to appreciate the present moment and find joy in the little things in life.
Happiness is not something that can be attained through external factors. It starts with gratitude and a positive mindset. When we learn to appreciate what we have, we stop looking for external validation and find joy in the present moment. We break the cycle of always looking for the next thing that will make us happy and create a lasting sense of well-being and happiness. So, take a moment to be grateful for the blessings in your life and appreciate the present moment. Find joy in the simple things and learn to love yourself. Remember, happiness is a state of mind, and it's up to us to cultivate it within ourselves.
In addition, gratitude can also help us to cope with stress and difficult times. When we focus on the things we are grateful for, we shift our attention away from our problems and onto the positive aspects of our lives. This can help us to reframe our experiences and find meaning in difficult situations.
Another important aspect of gratitude is the act of expressing it to others. When we express our gratitude to others, we not only make them feel appreciated and valued, but we also strengthen our own relationships and connections with them. This can lead to a greater sense of social support and belonging, which is crucial for our well-being.
One of the hardest and most challenging things I found with gratitude is that it requires us to slow down and be present in the moment. We live in a world that moves at a frenetic pace, where we are constantly bombarded with information, distractions, and the pressure to achieve more. This makes it difficult to take the time to appreciate what we have.
However, taking the time to practice gratitude can have a profound impact on our lives. Research has shown that people who regularly practice gratitude experience more positive emotions, feel more alive, sleep better, express more compassion and kindness, and even have stronger immune systems.
In conclusion, I promise you, my friend, cultivating gratitude is essential for true happiness and fulfillment. It requires us to shift our focus from external factors to the internal aspects of our lives, such as our mindset and relationships. By practicing gratitude regularly and expressing it to others, we can create a more positive and meaningful life.
If you are reading this, it's not an accident, you are meant to find happiness and joy every single day. So, let me help you break the cycle!
