Do you feel like your life is a constant cycle of chaos? Do you find yourself buried under piles of clothes, papers, and miscellaneous items? If so, you may be in need of a good decluttering.
Not only will decluttering help you organise your physical space, but it can also help you get rid of emotional baggage and achieve a sense of peace and clarity. In this blog post, we'll explore the journey of decluttering and how it can transform your life.
When we hold onto clutter, we are essentially holding onto our baggage from the past. The things we accumulate over time often have sentimental or emotional attachments that make it difficult to let go. Whether it's a box of old letters, a childhood toy, your grown-up children’s stuff, unopened perfume bottles, jewellery, or an article of clothing we haven't worn in years, we hold onto these items as a way of holding onto memories, feelings, and experiences from our past.
Clutter can be defined as any unwanted or unnecessary items that take up space in our homes or workspaces. It can range from physical clutter, such as piles of paper, clothes, and random objects, to digital clutter, such as a cluttered email inbox or multiple open tabs on your computer screen. Whatever form it takes, clutter has a way of building up and taking a toll on our mental and emotional well-being.
Let’s look at it from another perspective, some hold onto things because they feel that these items hold a financial value. When we hold onto items we no longer need or use, we are essentially wasting money on things that are taking up 
space and not adding value to our lives. For example, if you have a closet full of clothes you never wear, you may be tempted to buy new clothes to fill the gaps in your wardrobe, even though you already have plenty of clothes, some still with sales tags attached. This cycle of buying and accumulating more things can quickly become expensive and unsustainable.
Additionally, clutter can also prevent us from making money. If you have a home or workspace that is cluttered and disorganised, it can be difficult to find what you need, be productive, and make progress on your goals. This can hold you back from earning more money or advancing in your career.
In terms of emotional baggage, clutter is often connected to our past experiences and emotions. We hold onto items because they remind us of happy memories or because they have sentimental value. However, we may also hold onto items out of guilt, shame, or fear. For example, we may hold onto a gift from an ex-partner, even though it brings up negative emotions, or we may hold onto old paperwork or bills out of fear of forgetting to pay them.
This emotional baggage can be heavy and hold us back from moving forward in our lives. It can prevent us from making changes or taking risks because we are too attached to our past experiences and possessions.
Clearing clutter can help us break free from these negative cycles and create space for new experiences and opportunities. It can help us save money, make money, and let go of emotional baggage that no longer serves us.
While there's nothing inherently wrong with holding onto meaningful items, the problem arises when clutter starts to take over our physical and mental space. Clutter can make it difficult to focus, be productive, and feel at ease in our own spaces. It can also trigger feelings of anxiety, overwhelm, and even depression.
I learned a very valuable lesson when my Dad passed away almost 14 years ago. I flew to London to help my Mum get through the paperwork. They were married for 45 years so you can imagine how hard it was for all of us but especially my mum. They had never lived apart.
My brother and I climbed into the attic and we brought everything down because we knew some of it could be donated, given away or thrown.
I know my mum had a lot of sentiments about certain things, which she kept, but other than a few things from my childhood, I didn’t want anything. These were items that we brought with us when we moved to London from Nairobi in 1978 and these boxes hadn’t been opened since they were tucked into the loft!
Remember, our kids are going to do the same after we die. They don’t care what sentiments we had attached to things. They are going to sell the house and throw everything away unless we tell them it’s valuable. I know there are lots of things I would love to hold onto from home but then I have to remember that my kids are going to throw it all out!
Before you can start decluttering, you need to identify what exactly is cluttering up your space. Take a look around your home or office and make note of anything that seems out of place, unnecessary, or just plain overwhelming. This could be anything from old clothes you haven't worn in years to piles of paperwork that has been piling up on your desk.
We all know that clearing clutter can be a daunting task, but it can also be quite entertaining if you approach it with a sense of humour. Here are some funny thoughts that may come to mind while decluttering:
- Why do I have 10 staplers? Do I really need that many in case of a stapler emergency?
- Oh, look, my high school yearbook. I can finally show my kids what I looked like before I knew how to properly style my hair.
- Why did I keep all these expired coupons? Was I planning on opening a discount store?
- Ah, my old jeans from college. Maybe one day they'll fit me again. Or maybe not. Time to let them go.
- This random screw that fell out of who knows where is definitely important. I'll just put it in the drawer with all the other random screws and hope I find out what it belongs to. I’m definitely guilty of this and when I moved house it came with me – WHY? I still don’t know what it belongs to.
- I should have known better than to buy a plant that requires daily watering. It's been dead for months, but at least it was a valiant effort.
- Why did I keep this broken lamp for so long? Maybe I thought it would magically fix itself!
- I'll just leave this pile of papers here for now. I'm sure I'll remember where everything is located. Or maybe I'll just forget about it and start a new pile somewhere else.
- I have five identical black t-shirts. Maybe I'll wear them all at once and pretend I'm a ninja.
- This stuffed animal I've had since I was a baby definitely needs a place of honour on my bed. Who needs pillows anyway?
- My daughter’s 15-year-old perfume bottles are unopened, I should sell them and make some money, but years later, they are still sitting in a drawer.
But on a serious note, ask:
- Does this item bring me joy or serve a purpose? Words we've all come to love thanks to Marie Kondo!
- Does this item have sentimental value or is it just taking up space?
- Is there someone else who could benefit from this item more than I am currently?
- If I got rid of this item, would I even remember it a year from now?
- By asking yourself these questions, you can start to shift your mindset from holding onto things out of obligation or guilt to letting go of what no longer serves you.
So, what can we do to clear the clutter and let go of our baggage? Here are a few tips:
Start Small
Clearing clutter can feel overwhelming, especially if you've accumulated a lot of it over time. Instead of trying to tackle everything at once, start small. Pick one area of your home or workspace to focus on, such as a drawer or a closet. Set a timer for 15-30 minutes and see how much you can clear out in that time. Repeat this process over time, gradually working your way through larger areas.
Create a System
Once you've decided what to keep and what to let go of, create a system for organising your space. This could involve categorising items by type or function, using storage containers or bins, or simply designating a specific place for each item. Having a system in place will make it easier to maintain your newly decluttered space over time.
Let go of Guilt
One of the biggest reasons we hold onto clutter is out of guilt. We feel guilty for spending money on something we never used, for not living up to an ideal we set for ourselves, or for not being able to let go of something that holds emotional or financial value. However, holding onto clutter out of guilt only perpetuates negative feelings and holds us back from moving forward. Instead, practice self-compassion and forgiveness, and let go of the guilt that's been weighing you down.
I knew someone that held onto everything because their ex-wife threw out everything he owned. That trauma and emotional baggage is hard to let go of but guess what, the clutter, hoarding, the drama that goes with it, is the number one reason why our relationships broke down and arguments led to resentment and no going back!
Forgive Yourself
You didn’t want to be a hoarder of any kind but life is busy and its hard to maintain all the piles of stuff. Forgive yourself and anyone that has caused you feel you need to keep everything because it’s the only way to move forward!
Focus on the Benefits
Clearing clutter isn't just about creating a more organised space. It's about creating a more peaceful, intentional, and fulfilling life. By letting go of the things that no longer serve us, we create space for new experiences, relationships, and opportunities. We also reduce stress, anxiety, and overwhelm, and can feel more focused, productive, and present in our daily lives.
Maintain Your New Clutter-Free Lifestyle
Finally, it's important to maintain your new clutter-free lifestyle. This means staying on top of your organisation and resisting the urge to accumulate more clutter. One way to do this is to adopt a "one in, one out" policy. For example, if you buy a new shirt, donate or get rid of an old one.
Decluttering can be a hilarious journey, but it can also be a transformative one. By getting rid of physical and emotional clutter, you can create a more peaceful and organised life. So, grab some trash bags and get started – your new clutter-free lifestyle is waiting for you!
After living with a hoarder, I know firsthand what that emotional drama and baggage will do to the relationship.
If you are struggling to let go of the past, let’s talk. I’ve been there!
