We’ve been talking a lot about menopause –how this pesky gal can cause us to lose our self-confidence, how she can give us a run for our money with hot flashes, and the ways in which she likes to throw a wrench (or five!) into our lives. I hate to break it to you, but menopause doesn’t take a day off during the holidays. I asked her… nicely.
So, what’s a woman to do? We’ve spent years owning our womanhood and our place in this world. We’ve spent countless days building up our confidence and wisdom. We’ve been through so much to get where we are today, and suddenly, we’re experiencing this biological transition that wants to take us out–and not to a five-star dinner!
On top of that, the holidays are upon us. Dealing with the symptoms of menopause is difficult enough, but now, we must think about planning holiday get-togethers, buying and wrapping gifts for our loved ones, preparing menus and party favors, and more.
The fact is, we must admit we need some help this holiday season. You might be asking, “Where do I even start?”
Well, I have a foolproof, step-by-step process that will help you keep your sanity in check this holiday season. Check it out below:
1. Take a moment to plan.
This is arguably the most important step. No less than four weeks in advance, get out your notepad, calendar, and whatever you use to keep your schedule in check. Start identifying what events you must attend, the ones you must host, the loved ones you are purchasing gifts for, and what you plan to get them.
From there, plug those action items into your calendar. Create cushions in between responsibilities. You never know when you’ll get a flat tire or forget an item in your recipe. Calendar cushions are a godsend!
Having a plan keeps your cortisol levels low, and as you know, keeping stress hormones at bay is critical when experiencing menopause.
2. Make time to fill your cup back up.
Self-care isn’t just cliché, it’s a concept you must actively take part in to care for yourself and recharge so that you can show up in the world. Just like calendar cushions, you need to dedicate time to create a self-care plan. Maybe that’s scheduling a facial, or a yoga class, or a solo movie theater trip, or something else entirely. The point is to intentionally take care of yourself during this stressful time. This isn’t selfish; it’s a necessity. Need that glass of wine after a long day of Christmas shopping? Have it, lady! You deserve it.
Filling your cup back up can also mean getting clear about what you want this holiday season. For example, before my separation, our family used to pack our car with gifts, baked goods, an excited puppy, and two grumpy (but happy) teens, and make the trek to my sister-in-law’s home for an entire week. We danced, ate, drank, played games, and generally enjoyed spending quality time together. I look back fondly on those memories.
That tradition is no longer, and truthfully, it has brought me sadness. However, it did offer me the opportunity to carve out the holiday experience that serves me and fills my cup. It allowed me to get creative about our family’s plans. In the absence of what was, I got to create my dream of what I’d like it to be. It let me ask myself, “What do I truly want?”
For me, that’s taking my beautiful sons to my family’s home in England. It’s something we could never do since we were always stuck in Canada. My passion is travel, and I want to share that with my boys, and thankfully, I can do that this year. My separation was hard on me and my boys, but it allowed me to come back home to myself, to what I long for–for myself and my sons. I’ll get to see them travel, experience a new culture, try new foods, open their minds, and immerse themselves in something entirely new to them. It brings me more joy than anything ever has, and it fills my cup up. What is on your heart this holiday season? What will fill your cup back up? I encourage you to make a plan and go for it.
3. Delegate, delegate, delegate… did I say delegate?!
I used to try to achieve perfection during the holidays, but I never measured up. DUH! It’s because perfection is impossible, and it robs us of joy and peace. The holidays are stressful enough without us adding guilt and shame to that crazy cocktail.
Experiencing menopause during the holidays is just another thing for us to balance on top of everything else, so prioritize delegating your task list. Share your responsibilities with your loved ones. It makes them feel important and trusted, and it allows them to rise to the occasion.
What are some easy things you can delegate? I can think of plenty: putting up and decorating the Christmas tree, decorating the house, cleaning up prior to guests coming over–anything, really!
Need a little more help?
I am so glad you asked. First and foremost, I want you to know you are not alone. I’ve been exactly where you are and understand the difficulty of your experience. I am a certified life coach who can help you achieve peace, especially during the holidays. I would be honored to join you as you begin your journey towards developing a life you are happy to live. Let’s connect today and get you started on the first day of the rest of your life. Hell, yeah!
