"Being present." Oh yes, we’ve all heard it a million times. Whether you’re binge-watching YouTube wellness gurus or scrolling through Instagram mindfulness quotes, it’s everywhere. It’s as common as a cup of tea in good old London, but like a badly made cuppa, it can be a bit… bland. What exactly does it mean to be "present"? And how does it connect to that trendy little word "mindfulness"? Is it just another thing to add to our already overwhelming to-do lists, right next to "sort the laundry" and "finally learn yoga"?
Not to worry, I’ve got you covered. We’re about to break down this whole "being present" business in a way that’s fun, fabulous, and refreshingly real. None of that woo-woo talk, just the no-nonsense lowdown on what it means, how it actually feels, and why you should care.
Let’s Start with the Auto-Pilot Problem
Picture this: You’re in the car on your way to work. You’ve done this drive hundreds of times, so you zone out. Suddenly, you pull into your office car park, and it hits you—you have no memory of the drive. None. Zilch. It’s like you were a passenger in your own car, just along for the ride while your brain was off somewhere else, probably planning dinner or rehashing an argument you had five years ago.
Sound familiar? It should. Because this is how most of us live our lives—on auto-pilot. We go through the motions, distracted by our endless inner monologue, which, let’s face it, is usually filled with worries, judgments, and self-doubt. It’s like we’ve handed over the keys to our minds and let our anxious thoughts take the wheel. And let’s be real, they are terrible drivers.
Remember the days when you only had to drive somewhere once, and you’d know the route by heart? I used to be a human sat-nav! But now? I rely so much on GPS that I can barely find my way through a small town without it. For motorways and highways and roads lesser known, I understand completely….
“Oh, it’s just in case there’s traffic,” I tell myself, but let’s be real, using it for every little trip? It’s like I’ve turned off that part of my brain that remembers anything. Unless I’m stopped at a set of lights, I don’t even notice what’s around me anymore!
So, What Does "Being Present" Actually Mean?
Being present is like flipping the switch from auto-pilot to manual. It’s about grabbing those mental car keys back and choosing to fully experience life. It means actively engaging with the world around you, rather than just drifting through it like a ghost with a never-ending to-do list.
Here’s how it can show up in your everyday life:
Your senses start to light up like the Blackpool Illuminations and Niagara Falls daily light show. You begin to notice the little things—the colour of the sky, the sound of birds, the smell of that fresh coffee brewing in the kitchen. It’s like suddenly seeing life in HD when before it was all a bit blurry.
You’re more in tune with people. That chat with your mate at the pub? You’re fully there for it. You actually listen to what they’re saying, rather than nodding along while secretly planning what to say next or scrolling on your phone under the table (we’ve all been there). You can laugh but you know you’re guilty too!
Even the boring stuff becomes, well, less boring. Washing the dishes, folding laundry, doing the school run—these tasks don’t feel like background noise anymore. You actually notice the warmth of the water, the feel of the fabric, the changing colours of the leaves on your walk to pick up the kids or while you’re walking the dog!
In other words, life gets a little more... alive.
Here’s Where Things Get Interesting:
Now, let me stop you right there before you think I’m suggesting you’re supposed to float around in a zen-like state 24/7 with a halo! Absolutely not. Life is messy, distracting, and complicated, and no one (and I mean no one) is going to be fully present all the time. If you think the Dalai Lama isn’t guilty of zoning out now and again, think again.
Being present is more about recognising when you’re on auto-pilot, and gently pulling yourself back to the moment. Think of it like catching yourself before falling asleep on the tube, train or bus and missing your stop. You won’t always succeed, and that’s fine, but it’s about trying to wake up more often than not.
And How Is This Linked to Mindfulness?
Mindfulness is basically the gym for your brain. It’s the practice of bringing your attention back to the present moment, over and over again, until it starts to become second nature. You know how at first, going to the gym feels like pure torture (why are the dumbbells so heavy?!), but eventually, you get stronger? Mindfulness works the same way, except instead of biceps, you’re strengthening your ability to stay focused and present.
It doesn’t require candles, incense, or sitting cross-legged on the floor chanting “om” (unless that’s your thing – its my thing when I want to go deeper into my meditation). It’s about training your mind to notice when it’s wandering and bringing it back to what’s happening right now. It’s about saying, “Oi, brain! Stop planning tomorrow’s meeting and focus on the gorgeous sunset in front of you!”
Smartphones: The Ultimate Auto-Pilot Button
I know I just covered this in my last blog but I felt it needed a mention here too.
Let’s be honest, if we’re talking about modern-day distractions, we have to mention smartphones. Those little glowing rectangles are like the master switch for auto-pilot. How many times have you found yourself scrolling through Instagram, TikTok, Pinterest or whatever your social media vice is, only to realise that 90 minutes have vanished into the void? Suddenly, you’ve learned how to bake a soufflé, watched a cat learn to skateboard, and liked photos of a stranger’s holiday in Ibiza, but you’ve also completely tuned out from your actual life. Whoops.
Social media is designed to pull us away from the present moment. It's like a never-ending buffet of mindless distractions. You start by checking one notification and before you know it, you’re five layers deep into someone’s holiday pics from 2016. Your mind is anywhere but here. Let’s face it—doom scrolling is now a national pastime.
And here’s the kicker: It feels good in the moment. It’s a quick hit of dopamine every time you get a like or a comment. But once you finally look up from your phone, you’re left feeling… empty. Time wasted, no real connection made, and your brain? It’s mush. Sound familiar?
The Mindful Scroll Solution
Now, before you toss your smartphone out the window (please don’t), it’s not about going completely off-grid. We live in the digital age, and our phones are useful tools—when used mindfully. Being present means recognising when your screen time is slipping into mindlessness.
You don’t have to quit cold turkey. Try this instead:
Set boundaries with your phone. Yes, you heard me. That magical ‘Do Not Disturb’ button? Use it. Give yourself phone-free times, especially during meals, while you’re out with friends, or in those moments when you need to actually pay attention to what’s happening around you.
Turn off non-essential notifications. Do you really need to know the second someone likes your photo or when your cousin posts another gym selfie? Probably not. Every buzz pulls you out of the present moment.
Limit the endless scroll. It’s fine to check Insta or TikTok, but catch yourself when you’re three viral videos deep, mindlessly watching. Set a time limit, then put the phone down and look up—there’s a whole world out there.
My business runs from my Pixel, so I had to take drastic steps and removed the Pinterest app from all my devices. If I need to go there, I do it from a browser and set a timer for 20 mins and if I haven’t found what I want, I leave, otherwise it’s the BIG BLACK HOLE for me!
The Good, The Bad, and The Numbed-Out
Here’s the truth: when you start being more present, it’s not all rainbows and butterflies. Sure, you’ll notice more beauty and joy, but you’ll also notice the not-so-fun stuff too. Like those emotions you’ve been ignoring? Yeah, they’ll pop up for a little chat. That anxiety you’ve been pushing down? It might start tapping you on the shoulder.
But here’s the twist: that’s a good thing. Why? Because when you stop numbing out, you can actually deal with what’s happening in your body and mind, rather than letting it control you. You might feel more emotions coming up—sadness, anger, fear—but you’ll also learn how to name them, feel them, and move through them without running for the nearest distraction.
And that, my fabulous friend, is power. That’s where you start to realise you’ve got more choice in each moment than you ever thought possible.
You Are the Driver, Not the Passenger
Here’s the big takeaway: Being present is about realising you’re the driver in your own life. You’re not just along for the ride, you’re in control of the wheel. When you start being more present, you begin to see that you have choices. You can choose how you respond to things, how you interact with the world, and how you experience each moment.
You stop being a passive observer in your own life and start becoming an active participant. It’s like upgrading from a VHS tape of your life to an IMAX experience. And trust me, life is so much more vibrant when you’re actually paying attention.
I know this and still get caught off guard with scrolling!
Final Thoughts (Because We All Love a Good Summary)
Being present isn’t some unattainable goal reserved for monks or influencers with perfectly curated lives. It’s about learning to notice life as it’s happening, with all its messiness and beauty. It’s about putting down your phone, getting off auto-pilot, and choosing to engage with the world around you—whether that’s enjoying a great cup of chai, laughing with friends, or just washing the dishes.
You’re the driver of this thing we call life. So grab the keys, turn off the auto-pilot, and enjoy the ride.
